I have heard some guys declare that they won’t ever pursue any serious (marital) relationship until they can easily afford certain amounts of money. Recently, a female friend expressed how annoyed she gets whenever she hears about (good) guys who delay pursuing a relationship with the girls of their ‘dreams’ because they feel they do not have the money to do so. I understand the source of my friend’s annoyance, but I’m not exactly annoyed by such. I’m rather more or less disappointed. My disappointment brews from the fact that such a guy has limited both his ability and the ability of his woman. I believe in the strength of a woman to support her man to success. I equally believe in the strength of a man to pursue his dreams. I have also seen women support their men unto greatness, and men attain success by consistently pursuing their dreams. I also know that money is something that we can never have enough of, such that what you think is a lot today can really be minute tomorrow. With these in view, I think it is unfairness to oneself to accept limitations because of money.
Money is very important. Currently, there’s little that can be bought on earth without money, and sometimes, having a lot of it enables one to achieve much. So, I can understand what it feels like for a guy when he has little, yet is interested in pursuing a serious relationship. I however know that more important than money in such a relationship is the matter of consent and agreement. Have you asked the girl out? Did she refuse because you do not have money? I really doubt that a (reasonable) girl that likes a guy will refuse to start a relationship with him because he doesn’t have money. In fact, I know a lot of cases where the girl takes it upon herself to assist her man in birthing wealth. She may delay getting married until you guys are able to afford some basic things, but she’ll hardly ever refuse starting a relationship with a man she likes because of that. So, before you as a guy starts deciding things like this, just ask first. She may even not like you that much. Is this not even more important (and painful) than not having money? So, imagine you’ve spent two years making money to impress a girl to start a relationship and then she lets you know that she isn’t interested. How useful/less would that make you feel? Before you announce to yourself that girls of these days like money, let me help to ask you, “do you want ‘girls of these days’ or do you want your own woman?”
Before you start limiting yourself to the strength of money, may you realise that it may not even be the money you think you have or do not have that your woman seeks. Are you responsible? That may be more important to her. Do you have integrity? She may prefer that to a million bucks. Do you have a good relationship with God? That may be the most important thing to her. So, be sure you know that having money isn’t having everything. Moreover, if you can chase a thousand (dollars) alone, with her, you’ll be able to chase ten thousand.
By the way, what if she has more money? What follows? You detest her for having what you are yet to have? Please don’t be like this. Please don’t let money determine such things for you. Be beyond limitations. Be great. Be courageous. Take a step of faith, and with God, all things will work together for good.
God bless you.
N.B: ‘guys’ and ‘girls’ have been used in the same sense as ‘ladies’ and ‘gentle men’.