Becoming Undone

“It was her hair that got him to marry her?”

“How magical was the hair?”

“Isn’t that supposed to be so trivial… here today and gone tomorrow?”

“People must really be getting married for very crazy reasons!”

And she continued to consider the funny details of the story she had  just heard- about the man whose reason for choosing a bride was because she had the loveliest hair ever…

“But then, what if there was more to what he had revealed?”

“What if it was more than the hair?”

“Perhaps she was equally good, and smart, and tender hearted…?”

“How did the story teller even get to know these details?”

And she pondered some more, concluding that it really wasn’t her business, nor in her place to determine people’s reasons for their choices. She could pray instead for the man and his marriage, but she chose not to, preferring that people learnt to accept the consequences of their choices.

But then she began to look inwards, to ask herself if she wasn’t equally currently making any choice that people would consider insane. Her recent desire to relocate houses suddenly hit her, and she began to ask herself new questions- why really did she prefer this new place? Yes, it was beautiful and serene and of a good neighbourhood; but was there anything more substantial? She began to remember her uncle’s insistence that she finds a solid reason for house relocation or to remain in her current habitation.  She had fought with him, and accused him for lacking good taste in good things. She had let him know that she’d feel better and gain more in this new place she intended to move into. But her uncle had insisted that one could feel, and actually be better living anywhere, and being “of a good neighbourhood” shouldn’t be her (or anyone else’s) primary reason for shifting base. He had asked her to come up with written substantial reasons or forget about moving base. She had ignored him, primarily because she could very much afford the house without his assistance.  But she loved her uncle, and very much respected his wisdom, and in the light of this story of the man who she learnt had married because of the hair of a woman, whom she had also almost despised, she began to consider the fact that she may equally be in the same boat with him in this her desire to relocate houses just for the sake of convenience.

She subconsciously began to utter prayers for guidance over her choices, and surprisingly, over the man she had no idea who he was, whom she had also initially refused to pray for. She then realized the great blessings of having people like her uncle who would always stick their head out to see to the betterment of other humans. She began to appreciate him the more, and decided to sit in that day and produce a list of substantial reasons why she would (or not) be shifting base.



The hope that never fails

If we believe in God, then we should know that hope in him does not fail, but that any who has lost hope in him has lost everything. We shouldn’t ever live in hopelessness. We are of God, and since God is our portion, we have hope that all things will work together for our good, no matter how dark the paths may appear. It doesn’t mean that we will not feel overwhelmed at times, it doesn’t also mean that we will always have it all figured out. But it means that we have faith that God will surely come through for us. In fact, we have faith that God has already come through for us in Christ Jesus, and that we only have to believe and to open up to receive. This is our hope. It therefore means that we approach God with our burdens in the faith that he that has called us is able to relieve us.

So, when next the going seems tough; when next we are at our wits’ end; when next we are exhausted ; when next giving up seems to be the easiest option, let us allow God to rekindle our flame of hope. Let us let hope pull us through. Let us believe that he who has said it will bring it to pass. We have a God who cannot lie. Since he sent the sun to shine by day, and the moon, by night; since he sent forth man to dominate and multiply, he has never gone back on his word.

So, what is it that is deeply depressing you? What is it that is eating you up? Believe that God has already finished that situation, just ask to be shown how to go about it. He’ll show you how to pull through, because that’s what he does. He doesn’t ask us to hope in vain. If we dare to believe. If we only but try. Even if our faith is as small as a mustard seed, we can still utilise it in that same size to hope for the best in every situation.

So, the very next time you’re tempted to throw in the towel, don’t do it. Remember that someone has got you, and only needs you to dare to believe in him. This someone is God. If he made the heavens and the earth. If he created all that is seen and unseen, then, our hope in him is sure to be rewarded. Tough times may come, but people who chose to believe in God through it will persist, and will come out better and stronger.

So, let us always dare to hope in him that never fails.
God bless us all


Today has been great, and I’ve been very glad.
I woke up happy and stayed excited.
I’ve been blessed with good words, good prayers and good deeds, and for this, I’m grateful.

I’m glad for whom I am becoming, and I’m glad that I’m able to live in every moment. I’m thankful that I’m better on all grounds, and still hopeful for the best.

Today is a good day.
I have been blessed, surely.
And for these, I’m grateful.

Thanks to everyone that joined to celebrate me today. God has blessed you abundantly.

+1 and forging ahead!!!

Dear brother, I have prospects

Once, while chatting with a friend, we shared a joke where he asked me to marry him and I asked if he would give me 25 million Naira in return, then he replied saying no because at the moment he only had prospects- and could give me that and more in the ‘future’. After laughing together, I told him I was going to blog about it. So, this in part fulfils my promise and in another part, leads me to talking about my understanding of prospects.

I think we all have good or bad prospects. I also think young (unmarried) men are usually anxious about how they are perceived by females in terms of their prospects, especially when they feel that the females are beautiful.
I often barge into Facebook posts where young men ‘shade'(and accuse) young women for not accepting them because they do not have money/material possession . I do not think this is the reason for sane/sensible ladies. I think women and men alike do not accept the people that they do not like. If a lady likes a man, she’ll follow him. It’s that simple. If a lady is following you as a man because of your money, dear young man, be very wary or you’ll be doomed in a matter of time. You don’t have to ‘promise’ her heaven on earth, she knows she’ll get it with or without you in most cases. Just state your intent and let her accept or reject it. If she accepts, Fine. If she doesn’t, Fine. There’s one woman somewhere praying to God for a man like you, so just pray to meet her. Focus your energy on being the greatest you that can be, and not on pleasing a girl that doesn’t like you or that doesn’t understand your worth. Her rejection doesn’t make you a bad person, nor does it make her a bad person. It just makes two of you unsuitable for each other. So the next time you have to convince someone about being “prospective”, please, just move on instead to more productive activities.

However, if you feel that you deserve a girl because you think she is beautiful, better be sure that you have entrapped yourself to something very meagre. Beauty is very vain. Matter of fact, you’ll soon stop noticing- you’ll be so used to it that you’ll start expecting more. And more so, she’ll feel very entitled to your resources just ‘cos of her beauty. Is that what you want?

Dear brother, we all have prospects. Just chose the prospects that match yours and work with that. Life is supposed to be this simple.

Lessons of life: Birthing Freshness

About yesterday/two days ago, I decided to return to my concept of healthy living through eating as close to natural (and as seasonal) as possible, letting go of anxieties, studying/meditating on God’s word and getting enough rest for my body. This has already started helping me to eliminate ‘toxicity’ and waste from my mind and my body, and I’m already feeling energized more than I would ordinarily have. These ‘results’ are however, not entirely new to me as I have previously (about 2 years ago) subconsciously gone on a healthy/natural journey. But because I wasn’t so intentional/earnest with it, I got distracted along the line. But since this is my season of ‘intentionality’, I have decided on also being intentional about my mental and physical health. It also occurred to me yesterday that because I ‘naturally’ do very well in whatever I commit my heart to/determine in my heart to do, that my chances of doing well in this (and in any other stuff, really), are high (so long as I stay/remain committed to doing them).
Today again, while trying to consider why I may have been unable to sleep well, to achieve my daily goals and other related stuff, some very little ‘solutions’ began to drop into my mind: change (and wash) your beddings weekly, don’t repeat nightwear and day clothes (wash them daily), bath nightly, wash your ‘undies’ every day and other seemingly ‘personal-hygiene stuffs’. But this may be of greater effect than I can imagine, especially because a lack of doing these is usually as a result of ‘little foxes’: like a little tiredness here and there. And since it is the ‘little foxes that destroy the vine’, I may have to starve the current ones to death, and create NO room for more to come. I really hope this becomes a habit. I hope to take it a day at a time; rising immediately I fall.
As usual, I hope you join me along this journey of good intentions and actions in this 2017. God bless us all.

1. You may have learnt that if you really want me to do anything, just get me to ‘buy the market’ (that is, buy into the ‘vision’). LOL
2. If you have some thoughts about my use of synonyms/similar words together, just also consider me to be your Amplified version of the bible today. I really hope you get this joke
3. If we take some time to really pay attention to ourselves, we will discover a whole lot about us, and about how much we can (not) do.
4. I am squarely facing getting over an old bad habit. I may have to re-birt new habits over it, and starve it to death.
Ciao tutti!

Dear Bae, hoping for much better days.

2 things sadden me right now. First, my hair, and then, my phone.
Since the better part of last week, I have been desiring to braid my hair with ‘attachments’, mostly to keep my natural hair out of the way for a while, and then, to look beautifully different. I had a very slim budget for it: 3k financial, a couple of hours of finding a befitting place, and then, some more hours for making the hair- roughly 8-10hors and 3k. Dear bae, I spent 5k and about 80 hours- at least 74hours were spent in anxiety! I consumed my poor mind with where to get a good hair done with a 3k financial budget within Lekki-Ajah (for about 3 whole days or more). Then, I got a place at Ikota shopping complex yesterday, and spent about six hours making ‘feathers’ for 5k. As in, from 3k to 5k! Not funny. Worse, I don’t like the hair. This salon spoke a good game, but the outcome is just very ordinary. The only thing I enjoyed was their clean toilet, which I used only once. I was angry about the hair, but typical me, I smiled, said thank you, took their numbers and left. To add that they refused to ‘on gen’, and made me make my hair in heat until NEPA brought the light (because to them, 3k was too small a money), chai! Anyway, the lady that made my hair pulled softly, and I almost didn’t feel pain, until a second person joined and it almost gave me the ‘grains.
I am more angry (working on doucing it), that I spent more than my financial budget for such an ordinary hair. I felt so used when I saw the done deal. Actually, I started hating the hair when the braiding started taking shape, cause I saw everything, courtesy of the mirror that was ever before me.
If I had money right now, I’ll walk into a good (in deeds) natural hair salon, lose it, and twist my natural hair, and be HAPPY. Gosh, I feel very bad. Who put me up to this? I’m already crying (can you hold me for a second while I shed tears of disappointment). They talked such a good game that I was expecting the hair to blow my mind- but it’s just very ordinary. And to think that I almost doubled my financial budget for it! And to add that they wanted to charge me about 8k o! Kai, had I spent 8k on this hair, I might just have been heart broken.

To stretch this sadness, this Z10 started acting up. I hadn’t subscribed for a while, and immediately I did, it started misbehaving. It has shown me the ‘bb error…/20, flat battery with exclamation marks, and gone off and on at will’, just in about 18hours! Gosh, this is a (new) gift, and I’m not happy about this. What’s currently paining me more is that it’s currently working as a telephone: I have to constantly plug it to electricity to continue using it, if I take it out, it goes off! I’m very sad. God, please make things better.
In fact, I’ll just work hard and make the money for a good (i)phone. God!

Anyway, I’m glad this is a new day. I hope it takes away the sorrows of yesterday. I hope I do not ever get anxious for any (trivial) thing. I hope I do not fall prey to good game talkers, and I hope to commit to success.
I’m sad, but it will be better. I will it to be better.
Help me bae, help me. Help your dear bae.
Ma bi nu, contribute to my happiness. Getting some dollars in their hundreds will make some real sense now, I swear! Abeg, consider your bae.
Mmuah! Much kisses and hugs dear.

Being proactive, even with our reactions

Pro activity in this sense should entail being in charge of and intentional with/about our actions. In a cluster which I’m a part of, I listened to a woman speak about, and place value on intentionally loving your spouse when he appears to be un-lovable, for instance, while he is annoying you. I let this sink into me, and decided, in alignment with my decision to be intentional this year, to be intentional about my actions, even when I have to react to a given (unpleasant) situation. I consider this to be a form of pro activity.

I decided to be more alert in situations which I have to react to, so that things do not take me unawares; so that my actions proceed from the good/loving situations of my heart, and not from a seeming ‘turbulence’ in my head; so that I take responsibility for whatever decisions I may have to take in the face of situations needing my response. In this way, I do not have to turn back in regret, but in hope of good outcome-s, considering that I have put in my ‘best’ (or responsible action).

If I may extend such pro activity to my other business-es, then, it means that I’d always have to stay on top of my game, making sure that decisions are being churned out of wisdom, and not out of disgust or weary. I hope we all get better at taking charge of our emotions as much as we can. All the best to us.

P.s: “to churn out” has to be my phrase of the day. Although, this is only the second event where which I have used it today, I fore-see using it subsequently, and in a similar not-so-appropriate context [if you noticed].
All the best to us.